I’m feeling the need to get all tough love on you.
Not because you’re bad or wrong, quite the contrary! You’re just trying to get through the day without eating an entire stuffed crust pizza.
What I feel the need to get all up in yo face about is the level of denial you may be in.
I hear these things all the time, women will come to me feeling so exhausted they are finding barely any enjoyment in life because they’re so tired all the time.
Women who have this fat around their belly that drapes over their pants, feel gross, feel like they look gross, and it’s uncomfortable, and also, unhealthy.
Women who feel they have no willpower around sugar and carbs, who have tried SO HARD to be “good” and white knuckle it through, but the exhaustion and busy-ness of life takes over so motivation wanes, and then they find themselves self-sabotaging their efforts.
I know all about this, I’ve been there!!! I was so exhausted all the time, seriously I couldn’t string a thought together. I had this awful muffin top that turned into a baker’s dozen all over my body, and all I wanted to do was eat bread.
Women come to me in all this pain…frustrated, irritated, anxious, sometimes depressed. They have a lot of negative self-talk because they feel they should have this friggen figured out by now, but the problems are still here, year after year.
And then this happens……..
“Things will calm down when…”
“It’s really not that bad…”
“This is kinda normal, no? Everyone is stressed out these days, I’m nothing special”
“I’m just tired, I know once I get sleep I’ll feel better”
“I just need to get back on track with my diet and then I’ll feel better”.
And secretly the stress and rushing of life is almost like a badge of honour!
Why has this become a badge of honour? And what, are we supposed to feel like shit and then die?
Please, please stop lying to yourself.
These symptoms are no joke, and might be a sign something bigger is going on.
I have this one client, Mary, before she hired me she literally worked all day and most nights (by choice). She would wind down at night with wine. She woke up feeling exhausted and like shit almost every day. She skipped breakfast and drank mostly coffee and then would binge out.
Mary hated that she did all this but simply could NOT SEE how she had the time to be healthier. She knew WHAT to do, she knew she needed to drink less, to move her body more, to probably have breakfast…but she was simply convinced that she had to work really hard and that all of those things could wait until she was less busy.
Until the day Mary found herself with cramps so painful she couldn’t move. Until she found herself with such bad acne on her face she was embarrassed to talk to clients. Until she found herself in yet another fog of too much wine. Until she found herself in complete inertia from exhaustion. Projects at work were falling apart, her and her husband were fighting and Mary started to do what Mary does best when confronted with this kind of stuff…she started to retreat. To “ghost” as the kids are saying these days. She would avoid people, places and things and just dive even deeper into work, wine and worrying.
Today, Mary is a whole new human. The transformation has been remarkable actually. Her skin is literally glowing from having lemon water every day and cutting out the wine. She is sleeping for the first time in YEARS. She wakes up with actual energy and this makes her even more productive which means…wait for it…she’s making MORE MONEY. She has lost 18lbs while eating delicious and healthy foods (no depriving in sight!)
I could go on with the transformation, but believe me when I say, Mary is literally a whole new woman.
All happened with intentional actions, accountability, support, and the ability to look beyond just food and into the behaviours and state of mind she was in every day that drove her destructive habits.
Mary now knows the difference between feeling like shit every day, and feeling energized all day long. She is no longer convinced she can wait to take care of herself. She has big plans for life, and the way she was going before, she wasn’t going to be able to reach them anytime soon, or even enjoy them when she did.
So I beg of you…if these are your secret thoughts:
I just want to feel better.
I wish I could stay in bed all day.
I’m tired of being a victim but it’s like I’m so far in the hole I don’t feel I can get out unless someone is
holding my hand.
I totally get all of this intellectually; I just don’t do it.
I feel like my life is slipping by.
Food is the only thing I look forward to.
I used to run, be athletic, have so much energy and food wasn’t needed. Now, I will choose food over
most other things.
And then in the same breath you say:
“But it’s not that bad.”
“I’ll just wait until…”
“I have no time for this…”
“This is NORMAL.”
Then please be honest with yourself – because denying how bad it really is may lead to more dangerous things, and then something major will happen (I see it all the time! Clients get diagnosed with a disease like Hashimoto’s or Diabetes!).
I don’t want that for you. But you have to also not want that for yourself either. So take a moment today, and reflect on really truly how you feel. Are you genuinely exhausted and running on fumes cause you HAVE to, you have no choice? Are you really not happy with your body and the way it looks right now?
It’s only going to get worse if you keep ignoring it – I mean, tell me honestly, are you better or worse now than last year (assuming you haven’t done much about this)?
I am known for dishing out truth, tough love and no bullshit advice because at the end of the day, I just want you to live your most Delicious Life.
So from my heart to yours, please reflect on what I say here and I would love to hear back from you what you’d like to do differently this year to feel better. Tell me in the comments below.