You’re going around in circles, never ending thought loops that have been plaguing you for awhile now. It keeps growing and growing – this gnawing inside of you but you shove it down, set it aside, rationalize it, justify it.
You know something needs to change in your life but you don’t want to ruffle feathers, you want to keep the peace, and make everyone happy. Maybe you’ve committed to this thing that needs to change, so you feel you need to stick it through. Maybe you’ve tried to change it but nothing seems to work.
But the niggle (and sometimes the outright punch in the face thoughts) is there.
Something is not quite right. In fact, it’s downright wrong.
We think that maybe we’re wrong to think this way – we are grateful, and we are trying to find the best in things. But it turns inwards, like a snake eating its own tail, because we don’t have any perspective on whether or not what we are feeling or thinking is ok or not.
When you talk to your girlfriends they’re not the support you actually need. They’re running with the narrative of what you’re telling them and they’re either commiserating – Oh wow, babe, I hope it gets better for you, or they’re relating – yeah, I totally feel the same way that’s completely normal. Except what you’re going through does not feel normal at all, so this is not the perspective you need.
So for years you stay stuck in this cycle, never rising above it and it’s getting worse. You question yourself all the time and you don’t know the answers, you can’t see the way forward and you are wondering if this is actually something you should be complaining about.
You know your heart feels unhappy, but who are you to complain, first world problems, right? So what if…let’s say…you and your partner no longer have sex (or it’s sex that is completely unsatisfying to either of you), or you no longer really communicate…who are you to complain? You have a lovely home, great kids, a seemingly good life. Compared to many, you are truly blessed.
It won’t go away.
Because that’s your soul. All of those rationalizations don’t negate the fact that you’re not living your full life. And you know it.
So all these looping thoughts, the feeling like you’re going crazy won’t stop and you feel like you need some new input but have no idea where to get it because NOBODY is talking about this.
Well, guess what – you DO need new input and I am the one talking about it. It’s OK for you to want more even if you are so blessed. Yes, we can be blessed and still desire more for ourselves.
It does not mean you are being greedy or selfish or thoughtless – it means you are fulfilling your natural inclination to follow your soul’s purpose and the more you ignore this the worse it will get. Just ask anyone on their deathbed who didn’t answer the knock when it came.
There is no higher imperative in this lifetime than to know yourself, to trust yourself, and to follow your own unique path. Everything else is a BS story you’ve been programmed to attune to in order to be liked, to keep the peace, to toe the line…
But let me ask you a question – close your eyes for a moment and feel what it feels to be compliant. When you followed the rules, did what you were told or supposed to do. Where do you feel compliance in your body? What sensations come up when you are being compliant?
Now remember a time when you were rebellious. When you did what YOU wanted to do, no matter what anyone else thought. Where does SHE live inside of you? What sensations come up when you feel into living life on your terms?
Knowing your truth and who you are is the highest act of integrity, love, compassion and generosity we can do.
We tell our kids all the time – be yourself.
And who do your kids learn from…? You. And so if you’re not living your highest truth, who is giving them permission to do so? Nobody ever gave you permission to be truly you.
Well, guess what? I am giving you that permission. I am the invitation you need to get out of this looping groundhog day, get the perspective you need, the clarity, the action steps and the momentum forward to learning who you are, trusting yourself, and making the changes you know you want to make in your life.
All of this discomfort and unhappiness and unsettling you feel is because you know you are living out of alignment and it is totally OK for you to explore this. In fact, it’s morally imperative you do so.
The gifts you have to share, the love when you shed the BS is so gorgeous and such a gift to the world. The world needs YOU to be your full self, woman. Stop putting the bullshit obligations and shoulds and put your wise, knowing heart first for a change.
If you’re ready to dive in and explore this, book an Awakening session with me today. On this call together we will help you claim what it is you desire, create a plan to get it, clear the blocks that stop you and take massive action.